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Band 5.5CEFR B2Task 2330 words

Some people say that modern technology has made shopping today esaier. Others disagree Discuss the both views and give your own opinion

The essay addresses all parts of the task and presents a clear position, though the conclusion and the final paragraph contradict each other regarding the writer's stance. Cohes...

IELTS WritingCEFR B2Checked

Prompt

Some people say that modern technology has made shopping today esaier. Others disagree Discuss the both views and give your own opinion

Essay review

Annotated essay

Interactive

Technology is advancing by leaps and bounds. A great deal of persons consider that technology has made purchasing to be simple in these days, whereas others think that technology has made shopping even more perplexing. This essay discusses both viewpoints and I strongly agree with the former opinion for the following reasons.

To begin with, modern technology has made shopping so simpler. People can acquire any products at their home without going to store. To clarify, there are plenty of digital shops are available while humans can order within a fraction of seconds through cellphones or computers. For example, online shopping website provides a plethora of offers and discounts it depending on the quality so that humans can get products with cheap prices. To be more precise, technology has reduced the delivery time too which people get products from around the world and many virtual shops are being delivered goods around the world wide like eBay and Amazon. Therefore, shopping to be easier through modern technology.

In contrast, technology has made shopping more confusing because of the multifarious choices and virtual platforms, and as a result, humankind has more confusion when buying things. Sometimes people have to buy unwanted products due to numerous offers, advertisements and discounts, thus, they become addicted to buying more and more goods from online shopping. For instance, one of the top online shopping websites, eBay delivers plenty of advertisements on social media to stimulate people's buying capacity with a plethora of offers. Hence, technology has made shopping more confusing.

To conclude, although technology has made shopping to be easier because human beings can buy any products from their places without going to shop and it provides plenty of discounts and offers, technology has made shopping more confusing because a plethora of choices and offers so that people have to buy unwanted things by provoking.

In my opinion, about this, I strongly agree that technology has made shopping to be complicated due to its many benefits.

Improvement plan

Close to Band 6.0

Current Band 5.5

Target Band 6.0

  • A consistent stance without internal contradictions in the conclusion
  • Fewer grammatical errors in subject-verb agreement and comparative structures
  • Greater lexical variety to avoid constant repetition of basic terms

Strengths

Task Response

Establishes a clear introductory roadmap and states the writer's stance directly.

Coherence

Uses a clear topic sentence to introduce the first body paragraph's main theme.

Weaknesses

Contradictory Stance in Conclusion

High

The conclusion claims one view, while the final paragraph abruptly states the opposite view, creating confusion regarding the author's true position.

Persistent Subject-Verb Agreement Errors

High

Errors such as plural subjects combined with incorrect singular verbs or redundant auxiliary combinations undermine grammatical accuracy.

Lexical Repetition and Awkward Collocations

Medium

High frequency of repeated words ('shopping', 'technology', 'offers') and non-standard collocations reduce lexical quality.

Priority improvements

  1. 1Maintain a Consistent Stance and Clear ConclusionThe essay contradicts its own thesis in the final paragraph by switching which side it agrees with. Ensuring the thesis, body paragraphs, and conclusion align will immediately improve Task Response.Impact: High
  2. 2Eliminate Subject-Verb Agreement ErrorsRepeated errors in clause agreement (e.g., plural subjects with incorrect verbs) pull down Grammatical Range and Accuracy.Impact: Medium
  3. 3Broaden Lexical Range and Avoid RepetitionThe vocabulary relies heavily on repeating words like 'technology', 'shopping', and 'offers'. Utilizing synonyms and natural collocations will boost Lexical Resource.Impact: Medium

Error patterns

Band & CEFR

Band 5.5

B2

Confidence: High

Assessment summary

The essay addresses all parts of the task and presents a clear position, though the conclusion and the final paragraph contradict each other regarding the writer's stance. Cohesion is maintained through basic paragraphing and linking devices, but lexical range is limited with frequent repetition and unnatural collocations. Grammatical control is hindered by persistent subject-verb agreement errors, awkward comparative forms ('so simpler'), and punctuation issues.

Scoring criteria

Strengths

  • Attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary such as 'virtual platforms', 'digital shops', and 'advertisements'.

Weaknesses

  • Frequent repetition of basic words like 'technology', 'shopping', 'products', 'offers', and 'confusing'.
  • Non-standard collocations and word choices recur throughout the essay (e.g., 'A great deal of persons', 'cheap prices', 'buying capacity').
  • Spelling error present ('esaier' in the prompt, but also 'world wide' split incorrectly in the text).

Justification

Lexical range is limited and inadequate for unfamiliar tasks; noticeable errors in word choice and collocation restrict the score to 5.0.

Writing stats

Words
330
Paragraphs
5
Estimated time
3 min read
Grammar issues
10
Lexical suggestions
5
Major issues
11
Minor issues
6
Top error pattern
Subject-Verb Agreement Mismatch
Confidence
High
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