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Band 6.0CEFR B2Task 2280 words

Unhealthy food has negative effect on both individuals and on the society they live in. Some people think that the government should tax the unhealthy food while others say that fat tax is unfair an unnecessary. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The essay addresses both views regarding fat taxes and presents a clear personal opinion. The structure follows a standard four-paragraph format with valid supporting reasoning ...

IELTS WritingCEFR B2Checked

Prompt

Unhealthy food has negative effect on both individuals and on the society they live in. Some people think that the government should tax the unhealthy food while others say that fat tax is unfair an unnecessary. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Essay review

Annotated essay

Interactive

There is no denying the fact that sugary drinks consumption lead to serious illness that includes obesity and diabetes. However, there is ongoing debate regarding whether the state should charge its citizens for unhealthy food, or others think it is unessentail to do so. I firmly believe that introducing such act in the society is crutial in order to reduce healthcare burden in the country.

In terms of imposing sugar and fat taxation in the unhealthy food items, it is intial step toward changing individual behaviors for better healthy lifestyle. The main reason given to support this claim is that people will tend rethink twice before purchasing taxed food items, and therefore search for best organic options. For example, a recent study, in the UK, demonstrated that after applying the sugar levy the people perferred alternative cheaper choices with less sugar and fas such as in soft drinks and eating items at supermarkets. Therefore, this practice has a "nudging" effect toward healthier life of people.

On the other hand, it can been argued that implementing extra charges on food is unjustfied by the goverments. This is because this legislation will create more finincial pressures on disadvantged families. In the other words, they required to pay extra for their children and family memebers. In addition, goverments should focus for other solutions, for instance through health promotion and health education. Thus, the community to be empowered and aware about well-being.

To sum up, I stongly believe that goverments should start leving sugary drinks and unhealthy food, as this action will alarm the citzens to choose the best for their nutrition. Also, this will reduce the health care service pressure in the country.

Improvement plan

Close to Band 6.5

Current Band 6.0

Target Band 6.5

  • Fewer basic grammatical errors across simple and complex sentences.
  • Accurate spelling on common academic and standard vocabulary items.
  • More precise lexical collocations and natural transitional phrases.

Strengths

Task Response

The writer clearly states their personal stance in the introduction, maintaining consistency throughout the response.

Coherence

The body paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence indicating a shift to the opposing viewpoint.

Weaknesses

Frequent Grammatical Inaccuracies

High

Repeated errors in subject-verb agreement, passive verb forms, and missing auxiliary verbs reduce grammatical accuracy.

Spelling and Word Formation Issues

Medium

Multiple misspellings of key words ('crutial', 'unessentail', 'unjustfied', 'goverments') detract from lexical polish.

Priority improvements

  1. 1Eliminate Grammatical Errors (Subject-Verb Agreement and Tenses)Fixing agreement mismatches and modal/passive verb forms will directly improve grammatical accuracy and clarity.Impact: High
  2. 2Proofread for Spelling AccuracyAddressing recurring spelling mistakes ('goverments', 'crutial', 'finincial') will enhance lexical presentation and overall impression.Impact: Medium

Error patterns

Band & CEFR

Band 6.0

B2

Confidence: High

Assessment summary

The essay addresses both views regarding fat taxes and presents a clear personal opinion. The structure follows a standard four-paragraph format with valid supporting reasoning and examples. However, the response is impacted by recurring grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues, tense control problems, and spelling mistakes across key academic words.

Scoring criteria

Strengths

  • Demonstrates attempts at complex sentences using relative clauses and conditional-like structures.
  • Some simple and compound clauses are formed accurately.

Weaknesses

  • Frequent subject-verb agreement errors ('sugary drinks consumption lead').
  • Persistent tense and passive voice control issues ('can been argued', 'they required to pay').
  • Fragmented or awkward sentence structures in conclusion and body paragraphs ('Thus, the community to be empowered').

Justification

Grammatical errors are frequent across simple and complex structures, occasionally impeding smooth reading and placing the grammar score at Band 5.5.

Writing stats

Words
280
Paragraphs
4
Estimated time
3 min read
Grammar issues
7
Lexical suggestions
4
Major issues
6
Minor issues
12
Top error pattern
Spelling and Typographical Errors
Confidence
High